Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
