Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
