he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
