1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Your tits are I can't wait for
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize