Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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