I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
