How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Dignity is for republicans.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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