He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
i am craving dick and cupcakes
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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