in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
