Walk of Shame. In a state park.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
