I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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