I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
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