what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
