Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
