He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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