I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look better un-naked...
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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