umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize