she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize