I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
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It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
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It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize