Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Gross. gingers suck

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  (313): Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you (248): Gross. gingers suck http://tfl.nu/yt8q
  Replies (18) Good night (1214) Bad night (1852)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.

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  (404): Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one. http://tfl.nu/q7a8
  Replies (2) Good night (2772) Bad night (542)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy

  (1-843): View more from South Carolina

  i am grossed the fuck out

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  (843): so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy (1-843): i am grossed the fuck out http://tfl.nu/o4kg
  Replies (90) Good night (878) Bad night (6728)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.

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  (515): you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep. http://tfl.nu/cw9o
  Replies (12) Good night (6311) Bad night (723)
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  (510): View more from California

  I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.

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  (510): I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend. http://tfl.nu/lprg
  Replies (10) Good night (5758) Bad night (706)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift

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  (614): the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift http://tfl.nu/dh45
  Replies (19) Good night (4295) Bad night (1341)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.

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  (443): dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice. http://tfl.nu/lkbh
  Replies (5) Good night (2091) Bad night (1068)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.

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  (605): Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs. http://tfl.nu/6a2k
  Replies (14) Good night (2129) Bad night (643)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.

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  (218): After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house. http://tfl.nu/210e
  Replies (4) Good night (1134) Bad night (564)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.

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  (918): I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control. http://tfl.nu/enjx
  Replies (4) Good night (1133) Bad night (512)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.

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  (508): He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is. http://tfl.nu/qf8i
  Replies (8) Good night (859) Bad night (1568)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  An old lady WILL get vomited on today.

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  (617): An old lady WILL get vomited on today. http://tfl.nu/4fpr
  Replies (4) Good night (746) Bad night (1092)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.

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  (318): Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows. http://tfl.nu/7891
  Replies (0) Good night (591) Bad night (345)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.

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  (202): It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE. http://tfl.nu/cbed
  Replies (6) Good night (342) Bad night (1127)
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  (916): View more from California

  Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing

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  (916): Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing http://tfl.nu/jyrs
  Replies (4) Good night (422) Bad night (293)

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