She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
