Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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