Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
