is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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