What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
