Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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