so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
