I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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