Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I could fuck to npr.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
