So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
whose parrot is this?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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