I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Dick very happy bro
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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