Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
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