Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
