You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
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