So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Randomize