Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.