she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
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