Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Two words: nipple clamps
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