whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize