Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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