You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
