Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize