At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
