You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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