Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize