When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Come on in and take your pants off
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