they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I just got carded by a ten year old.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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