Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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