so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
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We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
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Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I think my moral compass just broke
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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