Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
