She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
